Worthless (Phan)
by agirlnamedcat
Summary: Eh, first Phan of mine. :P I really hope you like it, feedback would be excellent.
1. Chapter 1

**Worthless. **

**The new word painted onto Dan dripped from his arm and into the sink. It looked good there, it belonged. After all, that's what he was. Worthless.**

**Dan hated himself, his mom hated him, his dad left because he hated Dan so much, everyone hates him. He was worth nothing to everyone, so this didn't hurt anyone other than himself. **

**Dan's mom knew that Dan cut. She didn't care, though. Well, she cared, but not in the good way. She cared what other people thought of her, and how having a son who cut made herself looked bad. **

**She told him a simple 'don't do that' when she caught him with short sleeves in the safety of his room one morning when his alarm didn't go off for school. **

**School. **

**Dan hated it there. Nobody talked to him. Nobody paid Dan any attention. Nobody cared about the marks that sometimes showed when Dan decided on actually taking gym, not even the teacher. **

**So why was he still here? Why did he keep breathing?**

**Dan thought about this over and over again as he sat on his bed, his arms still stinging as they touched the fabric of his newly dawned long sleeved shirt. **

**Why don't I just end it?**

**Dan thought and thought, trying to pull any idea out of thin air as to why he didn't just end it. **

**Nothing.**

**That's what was stopping him. Nothing. Not one reason or one person would care if he wasn't there anymore. **

**Peace. **

**Dan fell asleep thinking these thoughts of how easy it would be to end everything, to say one last goodbye to everything and see it disappear along with his pain. How tempting it was, but sleep won over Dan this time. **

**So, into a dream-filled slumber Dan dozed. **


	2. Chapter 2

**Dream provided no escape for Dan, each one filled with the same scene, replaying over and over again. **

**It was him, he was the reason she jumped. He was the reason that her bones were so broken, and her face so torn up that they they had to cremate her. If he had just gotten there thirty seconds earlier. If hadn't taken the back roads to get to her home, taken a little less time to run up to her room and read her note. If all that hadn't happened, maybe Dan wouldn't have to see her falling, the look of terror spread across her face as she realized Dan had made it, but she was past the point of return. Maybe he wouldn't have to replay the sinking feeling as he heard her screams when she fell. Maybe he wouldn't have to wake up from hearings his name screeched at the top of her lungs, sweating, heart racing, and shaking. **

**And this night was not unlike any other night. He slept on his back, his fragile arms by his side, and awoke with a start, panting and quickly turning to look at the time. His clock read 4:45 AM. Not too early to shower, thankfully. He hated being awoken too early to shower without his mom getting suspicious, he had to sit in the dark and do nothing, trying desperately to fall back asleep. It never worked. **

**So, as silently as he could, Dan rose from his bed and trudged to his bathroom, rubbing his hazy eyes as he turned on the light. His arms were still raw, but the blood had clotted. He'd be fine. **

**He turned on the hot water and stepped cautiously into the stream of water, allowing most of his body to melt into the warm water. He left his arms out of the equation, knowing they would sting and not help with trying to calm down before school. **

**He stood in the stream of water for about a half hour before quickly shampooing his hair and washing his body, again, leaving his arms out. **

**He stepped out of the shower and wrapped himself in a towel before walking back to his room, the same routine of every day washing over him and taking over his brain. He pulled out the first shirt he could find, a long-sleeved Pierce The Veil shirt, and slid on his jeans quickly before walking out to the kitchen where he knew his mom would be waiting with a breakfast that she expected him to eat, which he never did. **

**"Good morning," she said a bit too cheerily as he walked in. He hated her cheeriness. It was as if she was purposefully making fun at Dan for his seeming inability to be happy anymore. He knew that wasn't really the case, but he couldn't help his feelings from going there. **

**"Eat it all, I'm going now. I don't want to find food in the bin again." She said, ruffling Dan's hair and putting on a grand smile as she left the house. **

**Dan sat, staring at his food, and waited to hear her car pull out of the driveway before standing up and dumping all of the contents from the plate into the sink and walking back upstairs. Dan knew that his mom knew he didn't eat, but she pretended he did. What was the point of eating anyway? Eating made you fat, made your stomach hurt if you ate too much or the wrong thing, and none of it tasted good anymore. Everything tasted the same to Dan. It was the constant bland taste on his tongue that was food. **

**Dan turned on his flat iron and held it to his hand while it heated up, trying to beat his previously set record of how long he could keep it there. Today, it wasn't long. He had given himself a lot of pain last night. He quickly straightened his hair and turned it off, then grabbed his bag and iPod and walked out the door. **

**Routine taking over his legs, he walked to school without having to look up from the pavement. He did this every day. **

**He trudged up the stairs of his school and past the doors to his locker that he opened and grabbed his books from before stalking off to homeroom, having to take unneeded hallways to avoid the massive crowd of people that always swarmed with gossip and teasing. **

**He sat down in the back, like usual, and waited for attendance to be called. **

**"Howell?" The plump, balding teacher called from the front. **

**"Here." He answered in his routine monotone, bare audible voice. **

**The teacher went through the list until the end. **

**"And...Lester?" He called from the front. **

**Lester? Who was Lester? And why was he at the end? L's don't go at the end, Z's do. **

**"Here." Dan heard from beside him and turned to see a new boy, his eyes wide and blue, his hair jet black, and his skin pale like the moon. **

**This was not routine. **


	3. Chapter 3

**Dan kept his eyes locked on the new boy, like he was the positive end of a magnet and Dan's eyes were the positive end of another. Almost inseparable. **

**Lester didn't so much as glance at Dan, though. No, his eyes were fixed elsewhere, on the board paying attention to the teacher droning on about announcements and school activities going on, each of which Dan had no desire to pay attention to for two reasons. First, Dan hated school. Why would he want to spend any more time thinking about it at home over stupid things like voting for who had the best hair in his grade or trying to get someone to go with him to the idiotic and pointless school dance coming up, and second, why would he care about something so small as the teacher when this beautiful boy was sitting next to him? This boy could be Dan's chance to change the robotic routine that had become his life. Perhaps he could make friends with this boy and have something else to do other than sulk in his room, the thought of his own death running through his head multiple times every minute. Perhaps. **

**There were a lot of those in Dan's life. Perhaps Dan could stop cutting and make friends. Perhaps his dad would come back and tell him he was sorry for leaving. Perhaps Dan could snap out of this mindset filled with loneliness and depression. **

**Like all the others, this one seemed highly unlikely. Who would want to be friends with the school's laughing stock, the emo faggot named Dan? Certainly not this seemingly flawless boy next to him. **

**With these thoughts running through Dan's head, he looked away from the boy and down at his clothed arms.**

**Maybe this perhaps shouldn't exist in Dan's imagination. After all, what good would it be, sitting here thinking that Dan would actually have a slightest shot of being friends with this boy? It would only lead to disappointment, and Dan had enough of that. **

**Dan tried to zone back into class, but after glancing at the time and realizing he only had a few more minutes left, he stopped trying. The bell rung, and Dan slowly collected his things that were under his desk before sitting up again and seeing a note on his desk. **

**'Hey :)' was all it said. That's all, a simple hey with a colon and a bracket. No name, no explanation, nothing but that. But that simple 'Hey :)' was enough to make the corners of Dan's face turn up slightly as he left class and walked towards his next one because he knew, don't ask how because he just KNEW, that it was the boy with the last name Lester. **

**Maybe this could be a perhaps after all.**


	4. Chapter 4

**Dan walked into the next class and a wave of disappointment washed over him. Mr. Lester wasn't in this class. The slight almost-smile vanished from his face as he trudged to the back of the class and slid into his seat, allowing his fringe to fall in front of his eyes and block out the rest of the class. He reached into his bag and took out his notebook and the small scrap of paper the Lester kid had given him. **

**'Hey :)' **

**That's all. Why was it such a big deal to Dan? He was just looking for some friends, he was. He'd go about his day, get a good look around the school's social groups and realize that Dan was a loser, the one without a group to belong to, and not let so much as Dan's name pass through his brain. **

**Dan set his head down on his desk, feeling rather over-whelmed by all of these thoughts of what if and comparing it to what he knew was actually going to happen. The bell rung, signaling the beginning of class, but Dan felt a wave of sadness break over him. He had no strength or desire to pay attention, even if math was the one subject he kind of enjoyed. He closed his eyes as his teacher began lecturing about triangles and tried to regain his composure, not that he had much. He couldn't. **

**He started to feel himself drift off, but didn't try to stop it. He let himself doze and slip into the land of terrifying dreams. This time, however, it wasn't his usual dream. He didn't see her letting gravity pull her down, down, down to her death. Instead, he saw something else, almost equally bad. He saw his dad. **

**"Are you mental?! Why would you do that to yourself?" He shouted at Dan as he cowered on his bed, his body shaking with sobs. **

**"You're an idiot! You're clinically stupid, you are!" He continued, taking no time to even pause, the insults just pouring out of his mouth like a water fall. **

**"I can't even stand you call you my son, what with you doing that! Why would you do something so stupid?" Again, no pause. It was as if he had rehearsed this, every word coming out without even the slightest hint of thought. Like it had been pounded into his memory, like his times tables. As easy as saying two times two is four, he said things like, "You're so pointless," and "We give you everything, and you go and do this?!" Dan stayed under his covers, shaking as the words pierced through him, hurting even more than his blade. You would think that hearing this would make him want to stop, make him never want to disappoint his father again, but it did the opposite. It made him want to cut even more, distract him from the horrible emotional pain he was feeling and maybe risk going too deep and losing enough blood to end it. No one would care, anyway. His dad wouldn't have to call him his son anymore. He wouldn't have to live with the embarrassment of having a son that did something so mental to himself anymore. It'd be a relief for both of them. **

**"Dan, wake up. Class is over." Dan heard sharply from above him and he groggily opened his eyes to see his teacher standing over him with her hand on her hip. **

**"S-sorry." He mumbled quietly, wiping at his damp eyes as he sat up and collected his notebook and stuffed it in his backpack, getting ready to leave the room and travel to the next. **

**"I think you should go to the nurse, tell her you need a quick nap. I'll write you a pass." She said as she walked to her desk and pulled out a piece of paper. **

**"No, I'm fine. Thanks, though." Dan replied as he too stood up. **

**"Dan, I mean it. Go to the nurse." She said sternly, looking up at him, telling him he had no choice. He turned away from her and rolled his eyes before taking the note and walking as slow as he could towards the nurses office, entering it quietly in case there were any other students there. **

**There was. Lester sat in one of the waiting chairs as the nurse chatted on the phone to another student's parent explaining her stomach ache. **

**Dan nervously sat across from the boy, waving his hand to say hi shyly and smiling only the slightest. **

**"Hey," Lester said, a smile small on his face too. **

**"Hey," Dan answered, looking straight at the boy. **


	5. Chapter 5

**The Lester kid opened his mouth as if he were going to speak again, but was cut off by the nurse walking into the little waiting room. **

**"Phil, your mom called. Said you forgot to take these before school." She said as she extended a small plastic bag filled with three pills. **

**Phil was his name. **

**He stood up, looking at his shoes as he took the bag and popped all three in his mouth, swallowing all three with one gulp from the water the nurse handed him. **

**"Let me just call her to tell her you took them." She said afterwards, turning around. "Then I'll be with you, Dan." She called from her office. **

**Phil turned around after she left and spit out all three pills, stuffing them into his pocket quickly. Dan furrowed his eyebrows as if to say 'what's that about?' to which Phil replied, "Their my 'happy pills' but I hate taking them. They make me tired." He explained in a low voice, sighing. **

**"Do they work, though?" Dan asked curiously. He had always wondered whether antidepressants would do anything to help his situation, even though he wasn't too keen on medication. He had heard too many horror stories about them making things worse, causing the person to go insane and not be able to function properly at all. **

**"Kind of. It's fake, though. I don't want fake happiness, I want real happiness." Phil answered, sitting next to Dan. **

**"I'm Phil," he said, offering Dan his hand politely. **

**"Dan," He answered, taking the boy's hand and shaking it gently. **

**"Why are you here?" Phil asked, hoping he didn't shake the hand of a sick boy's hand. **

**"I fell asleep in maths and the teacher sent me here to sleep for a bit." Dan answered carefully, not letting on about the horrible dream and waking up with tears running down his face to Phil. He didn't want him thinking he was mental like his father did. **

**"Did you not sleep well last night?" Asked Phil, tilting his head to the left a bit. **

**"I don't ever sleep well, really. I guess last night was extra bad." Dan shrugged. **

**"I don't either. I have nightmares a lot." Phil admitted quietly. "Sorry, I didn't mean to dump all this on you." He added quickly. "Just forget you saw me with those pills. I'm not depressed and I don't have nightmares." He said quickly as he stood up and left the nurses office, leaving Dan alone again. He wanted to go after Phil, tell him it was alright, that he wasn't judging him and he wouldn't tell anyone, but the nurse walked it the second Phil left, asking, "Alright Dan, what's wrong," forcing Dan to stay put and explain why he had been sent there.**

**The nurse led Dan over to a plastic bed covered with a thin sheet of paper where he was ordered to sleep for at least a period, despite his complaints and insisting that he was fine without napping. **

**Dan spread out on the bed, sighing as the nurse left, leaving him with his thoughts.**

**Why had Phil told Dan all that back there? Did he trust Dan? He couldn't, could he? He only just saw Dan for the first time today, and that was the first conversation they had ever had. **

**Dan allowed these questions to keep running through his mind, knowing that they would keep him from falling asleep, which was the last thing he needed. He waited for the bell to ring while staring at the ceiling, counting the tiles, and thinking of Phil. **

Author's Note:

Wow, sorry this chapter really sucked. :/ I had a really busy day yesterday which is why I didn't update, but I'll try and update again when I get home to make it up to you guys? :3 Thanks so much for the follows and the reviews, they make me happy. ^_^


	6. Chapter 6

**The bell rung signaling that Dan was allowed to leave the office and go to his next class, his least favorite out of them all, English. He trudged through the hall, trying as hard as he could to find some excuse to not go to class, but found none and stumbled to his seat in the back of the classroom, groaning internally. **

**He glanced around as the rest of his classmates filed in, praying that Phil would be among them. **

**He was.**

**Dan spotted him as he walked in to the classroom, looking pretty happy for not taking his 'happy pills.' They made eye contact with each other and Dan nodded to the empty seat next to him, hoping Phil would sit there. **

**He did.**

"**Hey," Phil smiled. **

"**Hey," Dan half-smiled back, a full smile still fully out of reach for him. **

**Phil licked his lips nervously as he pulled out a notebook and turned to look at the board. Dan wanted to say something to him, to tell him that it was alright to tell him about his depression because Dan had it too, and there was no one he could tell even if he wanted to. Instead, he leaned over his desk to grab his own notebook and began scribbling his own note to Phil, just like Phil had done for him that morning, only this one was a bit longer. **

'**Don't worry; I'm not going to tell anyone about your happy pills. If I'm honest, I should probably have them too, except my mom doesn't know.' He slid it on Phil's desk as the teacher cleared his throat to signal the beginning of his endless lecture that happened everyday, each day a different subject. **

**Phil scanned the piece of paper quickly before setting it flat on his desk and peering up at the teacher, trying to do his best to seem like he was paying attention, not mentally going over his options on what he should reply. **

**He could tell Dan that he was grateful—which, he was—or he could brush it off, pretend like he had no idea what Dan was talking about and begin avoiding Dan along with any questions he might have about all this. The latter seemed more appealing towards Phil, but the note said that Dan thought he should be taking them too. **

**What was that supposed to mean?**

**Phil knew what it probably meant, either Dan was way too into drama and wanted to be depressed so that he got sympathy, or Dan was just trying to make Phil feel better, like he wasn't alone in all this. Both tactics had been tried on him previously at his old school, and both were rubbish. Even with thinking this, Phil still thought that maybe Dan **_**was**_** depressed like Phil. Maybe he **_**did**_** want to help Phil with all this, not because he felt bad for Phil, but because he actually knew what it was like too? The endless thoughts ran through Phil's head like a runaway train with a never ending supply of tracks going always going downhill and never reaching terminal velocity, as if it didn't exist. **

**Phil looked over at Dan, who was looking back at him, his eyes tired looking, but still gorgeous despite the bags that resided underneath them, like he hadn't slept in weeks. **

'**Thanks, I appreciate it. Maybe we could talk later?' Phil scribbled onto the paper. There was only one way to find out what this Dan kid wanted, and that was by asking and getting to know him, right? He handed the small piece of paper to Dan quickly as the teacher turned his back to right on the black board. He looked away, trying to seem nonchalant about passing the notes and look like he was paying attention when the teacher turned back to him. **

'**I'd like that.' Was the response that landed, almost immediately, on his desk. **


	7. Chapter 7

**Dan nervously began shaking his leg under his desk. He wanted school to be over right now. He wanted to be talking to Phil, getting to know him better, and maybe, if he didn't make a fool out of himself like he usually did, become friends with Phil. **

**The teacher stopped lecturing and handed out homework, telling the class that it would be due on Monday. Dan sighed as he looked down at the leaf of paper. It was filled with sentence structures that he had no idea about and identifying types of verbs and their tenses. **

**The bell rung and Dan stood up slowly after collecting his books, Phil walking beside him.**

"**So, do you want to come over after school?" Dan suggested, trying his best not to seem too eager to have Phil come over. **

"**Yeah, that sounds great." Phil answered, grinning at Dan. **

**How was Phil so happy all the time?**

**Dan walked to his next class which was, unfortunately, not with Phil. He did the same thing he did in every class, walked to the back and sat silently. He paid no attention to the power point presentation in front of him, instead his thoughts were filled with things he could try and say to make Phil think Dan wasn't a complete idiot. **

**The bell rung again and the teacher bid them farewell, and Dan, again, walked into the crowded halls. **

**School finally drifted to an end. Dan trudged through a crowd of rowdy football playing idiots to get to his locker where Phil was standing.**

"**Hey," He said, his eyes lighting up as he approached his locker. "How'd you know where my locker is?" **

"**I dunno, I just took a guess." Phil shrugged as Dan opened his locker and collected his iPod, a few books, and his bag before closing it quickly. **

"**You still up for coming over?" Dan asked cautiously, hoping the answer was yes, and that no one had told Phil anything about Dan and how much of a loser he was. **

"**Yeah," Was the answer that Phil provided, though, much to Dan's surprise. **

"**Great." Dan said, walking next to Phil to the school's doors. **

"**Do you have to call your parents to tell them where you're going?" Dan asked as they walked outside into the chilly air, both of their hair flying everywhere. **

"**They won't care. They work late on Fridays." Phil replied numbly, his smile vanishing from his face, making Dan instantly regret bringing the subject up in the first place. It was a sore spot for him too, family. **

"**Where do you live?" Phil asked, trying to regain his happy stature once more. **

"**Not too far…." Dan said, hoping he was right. He hadn't actually paid attention to how far his house was from school. He had walked to and from there every day for years now, and it didn't seem long for him, mostly because he was numb during that time. Not from the cold weather that blew through England for a good part of the year, but because he found that if you're numb, you can't get hurt by anyone other than yourself. **

**And that was what he liked. **

**To Dan's relief, his house came into view and both of them climbed the porch steps and entered his house without saying a word. **

**Phil politely took off his shoes and set his backpack by the door before looking at Dan. Now what? He couldn't exactly ask him the question that was banging in his head, could he? It would be a bit rude to just ask, 'So, are you really depressed? Or are you faking to make me feel better about myself?' **

**Dan didn't know what to say next, either. He wanted to talk to Phil, but he didn't know how to start a proper conversation. He'd gotten so used to avoiding people for so long. **

**Phil broke the awkward tension by sliding off his hoodie. Dan's room was sweltering, even with the ceiling fan on. **

**Dan felt his body stiffen in his hoodie. He couldn't do anything about the heat in his room, it was always hot. His mom usually wasn't home so he would wear long sleeves and lock the door until nighttime when it cooled down enough to wear long sleeves to bed. He silently began praying Phil wouldn't ask him to take off his sleeves. **

**Thankfully, he didn't. **

**Not then. **


	8. Chapter 8

Dan got along really well with Phil. They both spent the whole evening talking about happy things, carefully avoiding the subject of the 'happy pills' and why they both needed them. They went through every subject possible from Pokemon to Buffy The Vampire Slayer, Dan giggling at Phil's excitement when he mentioned the actress who played Buffy.  
"I don't even really like girls, but I love Sarah!" Phil laughed, quickly covering his mouth and stopping.  
"I mean..." he tried to recover.  
"You're gay?" Dan asked, his eyebrows lifting.  
"Um, yes?" Phil responded quietly. "Sorry, I can go now. You probably don't want me in your house." He said quickly, rushing out of Dan's bedroom.  
"Wait, Phil." Dan called, running after him. "Don't be like that, of course I want you in my house! You're the first person to be nice to me in a long time, I don't care if you're gay."  
"Really?" Phil asked, looking back at Dan.  
"Really, please don't leave. I like having you here." Dan answered, taking Phil's hand and pulling him back to his room, and closing the door. "Besides, I'm bi." he said, blushing. He had never told anyone that, ever. It was one of those things that he knew but never told anyone about.  
"Oh," Phil sighed with relief, smiling again.  
"Yeah," Dan giggled at Phil's smile. It was the most adorable thing on the planet. It made him feel better, like maybe one day he could have a smile so genuine as that. Probably not, in reality, but it still made him want to try to get there.  
"Dan, you're a pretty awesome friend." Phil smiled as he sat down on Dan's bed.  
Friend.  
Dan hadn't had a friend in years, maybe ever.  
"Really?" Dan asked in a high pitched voice, his eyes a bit watery.  
"Yeah, really. You're the only one who talked to me all day, even after...um...the nurse." Phil said.  
"Thank you so much, I've never really had a friend." Dan sighed, wiping his eye.  
Phil looked stunned and Dan feared he had scared him off.  
Instead of being scared off, though, Phil rose from Dan's bed and wrapped his arms tightly around Dan's torso.  
"I'll be your best friend, then." he said shyly, pulling back and looking into Dan's lovely chocolate brown eyes.

Author's Note:  
WOAH this chapter really stinks but I haven't updated in FOREVER so it's to be expected, really. No worries, the next chapter will be better and will be updated a lot sooner too! :3


	9. Chapter 9

Dan grinned eat to ear as he looked into Phil's gorgeous deep blue eyes. He felt like he could stare into those perfect eyes forever and be perfectly happy.  
Dan opened his mouth to say something, but was cut off by the sound of his mum coming home from work.  
"That'll be my mom," he says he reluctantly pulled away from Ohil's embrace and opens the door. "Come on, she'll love you." He gestured as he walked out of the room and down the hallway and stairs.  
"Hey mom, I've got a friend over." He said cautiously as the two of them entered the kitchen where his mom was standing.  
The look of surprise on her face is almost embarrassing.  
Dan cleared his throat, "This is Phil. Today was his first day at school."  
"Oh, it's so lovely to meet you, Phil!" She replied so happily. "Can I get you anything? A drink, tea, food, anything at all?" She kept going, shaking Phil's hand tightly.  
"No thank you, Ms. Howell." He declined politely, smiling graciously as he said it.  
"Alright, are you staying for the night, or just for dinner?" she asked quickly, her excitement growing my the second.  
"Um..." Phil replied unsurely.  
"You can stay the night if you want, you don't have to though." Dan offered quickly, hoping Phil would agree to stay the night with him.  
"Yeah, I'd love to," Phil responded almost immediately. "If that's alright with you."  
"Of course it is, dear!" Dan's mom practically shouted.  
"Dan, go and find Phil some clothes he can change into." she added hurriedly.  
Dan nodded and grabbed Phil's hand quickly, dragging him up stair to his bedroom.  
"You know, if you really don't want to stay, you don't have to." Dan sighed. "Mt feelings won't be hurt or anything."  
"Of course I want to, silly!" Phil replied, laughing and hugging Dan tightly.  
"Ah, this is going to be so much fun!" he giggled.  
Dan grinned at Phil's giddiness.  
"I know, I'm excited too!" he laughed as he began rustling through his clothes to find a shirt and bottoms for Phil.


	10. Chapter 10

After dinner, which Dan only ate a portion of out of habit, both Dan and Phil went back up to Dan's room to play video games.  
"What game do you wanna play?" Dan asked as he walked over to the bin where he kept all of is games.  
"Doesn't matter, I love almost every game." Phil answered from across the room.  
"Alright, sweet." Dan smiled as he began rustling through the container, trying to find Mario Kart.  
"Hey Dan, who's this?" Phil asked, holding up a picture of a girl with long blond hair and beautiful green eyes. Dan turned around to look at Phil, and instantly his good mood dropped. It was Lizzy.  
Dan stood up and walked over to Phil, taking the photo gently out of his hands.  
"That's Lizzy." He whispered as he gazed down at her perfect hair and gorgeous eyes. God, how he missed that all so much.  
"Who's Lizzy?" Phil asked gently, not wanting to push anything out of Dan, seeing as he had suddenly become very melancholy. Dan felt is eyes begin to sting and water, and turned around away from Phil.  
"She's an old friend of mine. We used to hang out a lot." he said quietly, trying to wipe his eyes nonchalantly so that Phil wouldn't see. He did, though.  
"Hey, what's wrong?" Phil asked gently, putting a hand on Dan's shoulder. Dan turned around to look at Phil and collapsed into a puddle of tear, hugging Phil tightly and sobbing into his chest.  
"Sshh, it's alright Dan. Everything's gonna be alright." Phil cooed softly as he gently stroked Dan's hair.  
Dan continued crying as Phil began to rub his back, trying to calm him down a bit. It was breaking his heart to see Dan look so broken.  
Dan finally calmed down enough to speak. "I'm sorry, Phil. I shouldn't have broken down like that." he apologized.  
"It's okay Dan, don't apologize." he said, taking Dan's hand and leading him to sit on the bed.  
"Do you wanna talk about Lizzy?" he asked gently, not wanting to upset Dan again.  
"Lizzy was my best friend for the longest time. We did everything together, everything." He sighed, wiping is nose with the back of is hand. "Then last year, her boyfriend broke up with her and she was completely distraught. She'd go for days without eating, she was always sad, and in some days I couldn't even get her to smile.  
"Then one night, she called me at 3:07 am and told me to meet her on her roof and that it was an emergency that I got there as fast as I could. So, I hopped out of bed and got into my mom's car and drove as fast as I could along the back roads because I didn't want to get caught by anyone. Anyway, I made it to her house and I ran up her stairs and into her bedroom and climbed out of her window just in time to see her-" Dan's voice cracked and his eyes filled with tears.  
"I see," Phil said gently, wrapping is arms around Dan.  
"It was all my fault," Dan cried as tears began to fall from his eyes again.  
"No, Dan. Sshh, it wasn't your fault, you can't blame yourself for this. It wasn't your fault, her fault, or even her boyfriend's fault. It was no ones fault. Anyone can be sad for any reason at all."  
Dan nodded, trying to believe Phil.  
"Thank you for being here, Phil." he said softly as he nestled into Phil's warm embrace.  
"Of course," he responded, squeezing Dan tightly, letting him know he was safe.


End file.
